Her call was the first time someone has called me to say goodbye from their deathbed.
I have never thought about “deathbed” as place before. In the years I was an interior designer I thought about the role of rooms, beds, sofas, lighting, art, floors, cabinets and shelves, etc in our lives, the places and surroundings of our living, but I never focused on the role of our deathbeds, the place and surroundings of our dying.
We think of death as a time of dying, of life leaving for the endless sleep. We think of graves and urns as the place of death. If you continue reading, I am going to ask you to imagine your place of dying, your place where you let life go, the whereness of the ending of your lifetime.
Think of, not just your deathbed, but your death window, your death books, your death mirror, your death art, your death clothes, your death blanket. These are the surrounding earthly elements of your passing. Think of the pillow under your head as you release your last exhale. The chairs where those you love will sit and hold your hands.
Most of us feel helpless with our unavoidable dying. This imagination of the place of death is an exercise in designing our death surroundings… Beauty, comfort, cleanliness, sounds. It is soul-empowering.
Imagining all this you might write a poem or a journal entry about your death surroundings, or do this inner work in a sacred conversation with a friend while on a morning walk. Death bed imaginations enliven our consciousness of dying and death. It is an exercise of inner development. It will enrich your experience of being human. It will make you more conscious of your Self. It is an imagining that will bring more aliveness to your
dying.
I can imagine at some point in the future, shopping for a set of sheets for my death bed, the way I shopped for the sheets for my son’s home birth. Maybe I’ll buy a pillow that I won’t use until it is my death time. What an opportunity to make death my friend, my home, my own.
Yes, I might not die in the physical place of my imagining. It might be in an ICU, a crumpled car, or the floor of my kitchen, but the imagination will be the true death bed for my soul where I will lay me down and go to sleep.
